if you please and if you would 30503

if you please and if you would(, please)
1. a polite phrase indicating assent to a suggestion. Bill: Shall I unload the car? Jane: If you please. Sue: Do you want me to take you to the station? Bob: If you would, please.
2. a polite phrase introducing or following a request. John: If you please, the driveway needs sweeping. Jane: Here's the broom. Have at it. Jane: Take these down to the basement, if you would, please. John: Can't think of anything I'd rather do, sweetie.